Would Your Younger Self Be Proud of What You’ve Accomplished?

Whenever I sit with a client, there's a moment when I watch them wrestling with society's expectations – that endless checklist of "shoulds" they believe define success. That's when I ask the question that often stops them mid-sentence: "Would your younger self be proud of what you've accomplished?"

I ask this because I've lived the power of this perspective. Recently, staring at my phone screen showing another update from my publisher – my book hitting #1 in multiple Amazon categories – I was transported back to my childhood bedroom, surrounded by diaries filled with half-formed stories and big dreams. That young girl, pen in hand, would never have believed this moment would arrive.

But here's what's fascinating: when I asked myself that same question, my younger self wasn't most impressed by the Amazon rankings. She was proud that I followed my heart and built a company where people could feel safe to be themselves, where a trauma-informed approach and compassionate care aren't just buzzwords but the core of everything we do.

In coaching sessions, I watch clients transform. The shift in their expression is always remarkable—confusion, then a softening as they reconnect with that earlier version of themselves who dreamed freely before others' expectations clouded their vision. We create a safe space where vulnerability isn't just accepted—it's honored. Success isn't measured by metrics alone but by our depth of understanding and support.

This question works because it bypasses our adult filters – all those layers of "practical" thinking that tell us to minimize our dreams. Our younger selves hadn't yet learned to doubt their aspirations or compromise their values. They hadn't been taught that success only looks one way.

Today, alongside an incredible business partner, I lead a company built on the foundation of compassionate care. We've created a space where healing and growth go hand in hand, where every person's journey is honored, and where success means creating genuine, lasting change in people's lives. Each time I work with a client, I channel that younger version of myself—the one who knew that business could be different, more human, and more healing.

Looking back through old journals recently, I found pages where I'd written about my future dreams. The specifics were vague, but the feeling was clear – I wanted to create a space where people could feel genuinely seen and supported. Those weren't just teenage fantasies. They were blueprints drawn by a heart that understood the power of compassionate care long before I had the words to describe it.

That's why I keep returning to this question in my coaching practice. It's not just a technique; it's an invitation to realign with our authentic selves in a space where trauma-informed care meets personal growth. Sometimes, the best way forward isn't by looking ahead to where others think we should go but by looking back to who we always knew we could be.

Ready to explore your journey in a space where compassion meets transformation? Let's discover together what your younger self might think about the fantastic path you're on.

I co-founded Healing Arts Center in Virginia Beach, Virginia. I offer mindfulness, somatic therapy, hypnotherapy, breathwork, and Reiki. I look forward to meeting you.